When Gut Pains can help Someone else in Pain

 

On September 9, 2023 I decided to write about an important post about when how M. messaged me suddenly while I was awake in the middle of the night in a struggle.  I had been a bit anxious about having the ice cream sandwich and yogurt yesterday – even though it was fun having that with my sweet hubby.

But I ended up having more gut pains overnight because of it, which kept me awake.  I figured since I felt more awake that I would catch up on notes for some of my future posts that I was behind in.

Originally if I hadn't had any gut pains I would have likely been sleeping in bed with my hubby – but because my gut pains were more painful overnight - I was on the couch as that's the best place for me when my gut pains are worse as I can prop myself up more with the pillow.

Because I was on the couch and working on my future post stuff - I happened to be available to M. when she messaged me

She suddenly messaged me to check to see if I was still awake and then she deleted the message that she wrote to me.  So I quickly messaged her back not long after – to see if she was okay.

She said she didn't want to bother me - which I said she wasn't, as normally I wouldn't be up in the middle of the night, but I couldn’t sleep anyways.

So that’s when she said she wasn't doing so well – and I was so glad that I could be there for her.

She told me that not good things had happened to her from her with someone she had known and that though it had been years and he had passed away - going to the house and trying to act “happy” when she was there was too much for her. 

She had told her parents about what had happened, and they seemed to have believed her to what was going on – but though it had been some time since things went on – she still felt alone and betrayed – as she felt like they were making her go back there again – and that they just don't care about her in that – when she let them know how hard it was for her to go there.

I knew the parents well enough to know they wouldn't feel that way – but I also know what it's like from my own experience how triggering it can be to go somewhere that’s so triggering that it hurts you so much still, even with time gone by.

I get it from M.’s point of view how hard that it can be and that giving her time is likely the best thing for her.  I also suggested to her writing things down when those strong emotions come up and possibly sharing it with her parents to possibly help them understand more of where she's coming from.

So with all that, I am glad that I had the gut pain overnight as my little pain was worth it – to be able to help with M.’s large emotional pain.

So I Thank you my Elohim (God) for this pain, as M. has going through so many things – which I had also for me in the past – but because she's younger than me then she has this time to deal with her trauma now as it's only been a few years or more for her – compared to a couple of decades and more for me and some of it still haunts me.

So I pray that M. gets the help she needs now so that it doesn’t hold her back like things have for me.

With that I know that I am going to be going into H.W. ED program treatment soon to hopefully not just get better from the ED – but also the things that are under it – as they are just symptoms of the self-destructive nature I have inside of me that really hates myself from so many difficult times in my past.

But helping M. tonight reinforced in me that I want to get better so I can keep helping others like her – so I can not just send the love of Elohim to other people – but for once myself too <3.

Thank you Lord for another sleepless night so that it gives me more hope for going to H.W.  I’m praying and hoping I will get better sometime soon – and that this intense Gut & Mental stuff that got so much worse 4 years ago won’t be for nothing.

That you are still looking out for me, as well as my loved ones, and also the hurting souls both in my life as well as ones I haven't met yet – but I hope to touch them with your Love.

You truly are amazing my Elohim and Yeshua.  I know this is a really difficult battle that I am currently in – but I thank you that you never give up on me – Lord help me get through this hardest battle of recovery and life – so I can be that Strong Older Woman – my hubby and I imagined of.  As I want to have that not just for me – but for my husband also - as he's always wanted a full wifey, not just a China Doll he’s had for so long.  One that can stand on her own 2 feet.

So Lord keep reaching me, M. and so many hurting people that are out there, and help them know that they aren’t alone, and that you understand their pain.

Patricia   <3   :)

 

Hebrews 6:10    For God is not unjust so as to overlook your work and the love that you have shown for His name in serving the saints, as you still do.

 

Here's a song for those that are struggling and feel like God or no one else knows how hard it is – but He really Does know what’s going on with you and He cares.

 

“He Knows” by Jeremy Camp

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GBXd8OqFVVw&list=PL3whQX319DaB37iB8NZpJe206iSdpe3kc&index=129