I am Safe Right Now

 

I decided to write today on January 19, 2023.  I’ve been watching online videos by this really great former therapist Emma McAdam, who decided to take what she’s learned over the years and put her advice online, so that she could help more people overall.   The therapeutic online company she started up was Therapy in a Nutshell.

https://therapyinanutshell.com/

I think it’s incredible she would do that, as it especially helps people that have trouble accessing psychotherapy as it is out of their price range.

I’ve been going through her 30 parts Emotional Processing Videos, and in part 11

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkJdKsiCyyM&list=PLiUrrIiqidTWje-Oc4uA6LZZO8vSaHaDL&index=13

Something that Emma mentioned in that video stood out to me, was about how relaxation skills can be helpful at times, for example watching TV, play games, going for a walk, etc., can help you get away from the stresses of life.

But it can also cause a person to get to used it, and it can be something that they depend on, which can cause a person to avoid the things they need to face in their life.

I know that I am bad for that.  My go to isn’t, lets work on this difficult emotional, physical or spiritual problem that has been plaguing me for so many years.  It’s the, what can I do that’s the most comfortable/easy thing to do.

It’s understandable to do that, when you are struggling all the time, to feel this need to escape, but in the end it doesn’t get you any more forward than where you are now.

Don’t get me wrong, using things to help you relax; can, and are very useful, and necessary, especially when you are way beyond your limit, as it can get you to a safer stress level.

But it’s important to not use it for everything in life.

The skill that she mentioned that was really useful was Self-Regulation, as it can help you actually work on helping yourself face the stresses of life more, and also help bring you to a more calm state of mind and body.

With Self-Regulation you want to help yourself figure out what’s behind the feelings that are frequently coming up in your life.

An Example Emma mentioned was : “I’m stressed because I constantly believe that I am in danger.”

When we Acknowledge that, It’s the belief that we’re in danger - when we are actually safe- that makes us anxious.

Then that can open up some space to change how we see things.

That totally blew my mind after Emma mention that, as I’m a very anxious person, and frequently my body and mind set me off, and I frequently assume I most be scared, anxious etc. because of the sensations or feelings that I have that are coming on.

But Emma reminded me that not all dangers we think are there, are actually real.  If you are feeling your anxiety go crazy, and you are legit safe, then it’s you telling yourself you aren’t safe, that keeps bringing up the unnecessary fear, stress and anxiety.

As Emma said, the goal of self-regulation is to pair the type of thinking “I am Safe Right Now” with a relaxed body, which keeps us calm, clear headed and focused.

So when I am in a struggling state this can help remind me to talk to myself, and take a deep breath in and to let myself know, that I am actually safe majority of the time - which can help my body and mind calm down.

All this just helped me to see that not only do I not have to always let my excessive stress, and anxiety control how I feel and think, but that I actually have another option besides getting really overwhelmed, or avoidance.

I can actually look around, and assess and see that there is no actual threat, and that I am safe enough to do what I need to do.

Like a little toy rubber duckie that my husband got me, that’s just sitting there happy and content, as it doesn’t have a worry in the world.

I can look or think of that rubber duckie reminding me to smile, and take a deep breath in and tell myself that I am safe, just like the rubber duckie is.  Another thing that can help is I can also think of my hubby, loved ones and my Elohim (God) who just want the best for me.

I know starting something new, even if it’s good for you, often isn’t easy, but it’s always great to have more options to help you get you where you can feel at ease more regularly.

I thanked my Elohim for showing me this, and I pray it can helps others out there, as well as myself, that when I hear “I am safe” not only from myself, but from our Elohim, and others, it will help us believe it is actually true.

Patricia  <3   :)

 

Psalm 91: 1-2    Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.   I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.”

 

Here’s a song about Elohim’s (God’s) Goodness restores our souls – and He guides our ways to righteousness.  Even in the darkest path to not fear the evil around as He is with you and are the comforter – and to trust in Him alone – and His endless Mercy and Goodness will lead you home to Him.

 

“Psalm 93 - The Lord’s My Shepard” by Stuart Townend

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-qLa_2GPcM&list=PL3whQX319DaB37iB8NZpJe206iSdpe3kc&index=32