Safety Net

 

I decided to write about August 12-13, 2022.  My hubby and I were watching the TV sitcom show Young Sheldon, Season 1 Episode 16.  There was at one point during this episode where Sheldon was getting stage fright before he was supposed to be the lead in the school play Annie.

    The teacher running the play mentioned to Sheldon, to try to help calm him down, that while at the circus the trapeze artists always have a safety net to keep them safe should they fall.

   He then said to Sheldon that all these people around him here, which was the rest of the cast of the show are his safety net.

  It turns out that Sheldon didn't end up doing the play, but what the teacher said helped me to remember that Elohim (God), my hubby and others in my life are part of my safety net.

 Hearing what the teacher said about having safety net people out there for you, meant that you could trust them enough to let them help you in your vulnerable state.  When I heard that, it helped me feel safe enough to tell my husband about something that I had been hiding.

It didn’t seem like a big thing at the time, but still, as I was trying to do little things to change for the better, like I mentioned about in my last post, I wanted to be honest with my husband.  I knew that he didn’t care for these Brazil Nuts, which were in a large nut container of ours.

So I decided to search through the container and take them all out in secret and eating them at other times myself, instead of throwing them out, because I had this thing with not wasting things.

Nathan let me know Brazil nuts have psyllium in them, and is fine in low doses like a few or so a day, but it’s considered a high dose if you had 2x or 3x or more about that, which they can be harmful to you if you did that often enough, not realizing that in the past, I may have had a little more then I should have at times, but not too much, which is good.  So it’s a nut you don’t need to eat a lot of.

So I am thankful to my Elohim for giving me a reminder from the Young Sheldon show that trusting my safety net people, like You and my hubby that day, gave me the courage to speak up about what I had been hiding.  I realized then that they had my best interest at heart to help me speak up, but even more so, for helping me to have my own best interest at heart to be more open.

It’s always been a hard thing for me to let people help me.  I’ve always been super stubborn and set in my ways most of my life.  I tend to be the type of person that hides a lot of myself from others, as I don’t want to worry, bother or stress them out.  Also there have been times that I intentionally would hide myself, as well as things from people, as I was in a self-destructive state in my life to not be able to open up.

I knew that Elohim had been tugging on my heart when He let that episode speak to me, so I could be brave enough to speak up to my husband about what I had been doing.  It really does take a lot of courage to be that vulnerable, especially when you feel shame and guilt about it.

I did feel better telling my husband, as he told me after what they could do to me if I ate too many of them.  So I was glad I was open about what I had been doing, so I could stop hiding that behaviour.

I know that it can be scary to open up to anyone, as it is can be uncomfortable to do, but when you really know that your safety net people in your life are trustworthy, it is so worth it, as it really takes that enormous stress off of you.

When you have your own best interest at heart for life, Elohim can come along side you and help guide you towards the life you are supposed to live.  It is for sure really hard to give up and let go of the things that you have been holding onto for so long, as you find that they help you cope and keep going in life.  The reality is that as you hold onto those things, the longer and harder your life gets, as you are only barley surviving when you are using coping to get through life.  When you face each thing one day at a time, instead of escaping or running away from them, then you really are living life wide open.

I can’t say that I’m totally there myself either yet, as I still run away and escape from my life at times, but I know with God all things are possible, so as I keep trying to lift my head up and do better little by little, I imagine some day it won’t be so hard.

I also believe this is possible for others out there too.  The great thing is that the more you try to get better, the more you can be safety net to your safety net people, as well as others.

Patricia <3   :)

 

Psalm 138:7    Though I walk in the midst of trouble, You preserve my life; You stretch out Your hand against the wrath of my enemies, and Your right hand delivers me.

 

Here’s a song about not wanting to just going through The Motions but instead deciding to give everything you could and trying to fight through the nothingness of this life.  Trying to Reach our Elohim (God) to ask Him to take you all the way with Him in this life.

 

“The Motions” by Matthew West

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ulEGBEtJXU&list=PL3whQX319DaB37iB8NZpJe206iSdpe3kc&index=21