Sharing Cookies

 


Today is September 26, 2016, which would have been my dad’s birthday, and even though he isn’t with us I decided I still wanted to do something for him since it hasn’t been that long since he passed.  It’s interesting how after a person you care about passes, you start to see them in so many places.  I had yogurt and luncheon meat that was to expire on his birthday as well seeing his name a bunch of times as his first name is pretty common.

One thing my dad always appreciated about his mother was her homemade chocolate chip cookies.  I can tell you that they are very tasty; you can’t just have one.  My dad would always have two cookies as he felt that one was never enough. 

My dad wasn’t into the normal birthday cake, so we always made him a special type.  We took his mother’s cookie recipe and would put the whole thing on a pizza pan and would bake it in the oven.  That way he would have a huge cookie, or as we would call it a ‘cookie cake.’

Last year on his birthday my mom was away, so I decided to come over to his place and bring him a bunch of chocolate chip cookies, since I didn’t have a pizza pan.  I spent a couple hours with him that day, and I’m so glad I did as I never realized a year later he wouldn’t be here.  I know he really appreciated me coming over then.

I decided a couple days ago to make my grandmother’s cookies as I knew my dad would have enjoyed them.  Today after lunch my husband and I decided to go to his grave site and have two cookies with him.  It was raining a little bit while we drove there as well as when we got there.  There wasn’t anyone around, besides workers, which was nice as we could have a private moment with my dad and say happy birthday to him.

I didn’t mind the rain as it made me feel like it was God’s tears coming down, like He understood it was a hard day for me today.  My husband and I parked beside my dad’s grave and stood in front of it.  My voice was strained a bit as lots of tears came rolling down my face.  We had four cookies in a plastic bag, so two for me and two for my hubby.

I told dad it was his birthday today and that we came by to share some cookies with him.  Of course I knew technically he couldn’t actually eat any cookies, but I thought it would be a nice way for us to remember him by.  As we ate our two cookies each we got a little bit of crumbs on his gravesite and that actually made me happy as in a way he was partaking of our cookies with us.

It was hard to leave, but I told him I loved him and kissed the grave marker with my two fingers.  I was glad that I wasn’t alone that day as Nathan was there as well as I could feel God’s presence with me.  While we were driving home we just happen to see an old mini-van of the make and model my dad use to drive go by us.  It made me smile as it was like ‘dad was saying thanks for coming by today.’

I can hardly believe that it’s been about 2 ½ months since my dad passed away.   Sometimes I have my hard days, but lately it’s been better, so it was nice today to be able to remember him again.

Patricia <3 J

John 16:22    So also you have sorrow now, but I will see you again, and your hearts will rejoice, and no one will take your joy from you.

 

Here’s a song about to bring your shame, guilt, and pain, and that you aren’t those things, that we will always mean much more than that to our God.  Even though we may keep wrestling with the voices in our head that we aren’t right.  But it’s important to listen to the voice that calls us redeemed, and greater is the one that’s living inside of me. 

  Remember to bring your doubts, hurts, fears, and tears to Him, and even when you fall you can remember that He is there to show you that you are redeemed in Him.

 

“Greater” by MercyMe

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXI0B4iMLuU&list=PL3whQX319DaB37iB8NZpJe206iSdpe3kc&index=154

 

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