Pearce the Heart

  On February 29, 2016 I was thinking to myself that I find I have trouble giving to myself.   I much more frequently give to others whether that is by writing an encouraging note to someone, my time, or buying a gift.   I guess there is part of me that feels that someone else would appreciate what I give more than I would myself.   I also know there is a part of me that isn’t a big fan of me, which causes me to do fewer things for myself. Recently as I mentioned before in my previous post I lost my job.  On top of that our car just stopped working a few weeks ago.  I have been feeling stressed by that and worrying about how we would come up with the money for everything and for a new car we need. Lately we have been getting a ride to the grocery store with my mom, which has been really helpful.   Actually it’s been fun to grocery shop with my mom again as that use to be one of our favourite things to do during the week when I lived at home.  ...

  On February 22, 2016 I decided to write about getting let go from a job, which is never easy.   Sometimes you can know it’s coming if it’s a temporary seasonal job.   Other times it can come as a complete surprise.   This happened to me five years ago.   I was working at a shoe store and didn’t have any experience in selling shoes before I started.   They told me that was alright as they would train me on the off season.   They did a few hours training at one of their other stores, and then started me the next day. I felt so overwhelmed with anxiety as I had never done sales before.   Sure I had lots of customer service experience, but it’s not the same as trying to get someone to buy something they might not normally buy.   I’m not a pushy person and if I can tell someone doesn’t want something then I usually leave them alone.   I found that I wasn’t picking up all the lingo for learning about a description of a shoe and how one sho...

  This Family Day on February 15, 2016 I found was one of the best that I’ve had so far.   When Family Day first started in Ontario in 2008 I didn’t think too much about it.   I thought it’s nice to have another holiday off, but it wasn’t that important to me.   I saw my parents everyday at this time since I lived with them and the rest of my family I usually saw once a year around Christmas.   For me it was like any other day besides that some of the stores were closed. Since meeting my husband I actually started to really appreciate Family Day more.   Two years ago I had my first Family Day with my husband, who was my boyfriend at the time.   We spent the whole day together snuggled up together on his couch watching movies.   Then after that he drove me home to my parents place.   I actually thought he might propose that day being Family Day, as I knew then that he would be my family in the future, but he ended up proposing a month later....

  On February 7, 2016 I was thinking that sometimes God tests our faith to make us stronger.  I had recently been feeling a little overwhelmed in life.  At first I thought I was coping ok, but I realized later that I wasn’t.  I had started to fall back into old behaviours.  I find when I feel like I need to keep everything to myself then I often feel the need to control things more.  That can sometimes bring back up my eating-disordered thinking. I had recently started a job at this new bakery shop.  At first I thought I wasn’t going to be getting that many hours, but a week later the store hours were a little later, which meant I would be working a little longer each shift.  My mood was still off at that point and I thought the extra hours would make me feel better, but it didn’t. Even though I have been in recovery of my ED since March last year I do find it still comes into my mind at times when I feel stressed.  With the store being o...