Pearce the Heart

  On December 21, 2015 I was think about how some people may not always realize that when you keep bitterness, pain, unforgiveness, anger etc. inside or feel that for others it ends up hurting yourself more in the long run.   I know this as I have experience that myself.   When I was in the worst of my eating disorder as a teenager I was not a happy person.   I stopped caring about trying to look happy for others.   I felt that if I was in a bad place I didn’t want others around me trying to cheer me up.   Of course this would make things awkward for those around me. I think in those times I was trying to push people away by not being good company to be around with.   All I wanted to do was be by myself with my anorexia as I felt it was the only thing I could rely on at the time.   At some point it became clear to everyone around me that my ED had gone too far and I really needed help.   The problem was that I didn’t want to get better ...

  I wrote about this on December 15, 2015.   This is the time of year when most people are celebrating the holidays – whether it’s Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, etc.  Often these holidays promote bringing family together as well as eating festive foods.   For some people this is a very joyous time to catch up with their family and friends that they have not seen during the rest of the year.   It can also be a time to give and receive gifts with the ones that they love.   Then there are others that struggle with these holidays, as for some it can be depressing as they do not have anyone to celebrate with.   It can also be hard for those that are not as well off financially; as they are not able to provide the gifts they want to give.   There is also another group of people that struggle with social situations and eating the festive foods during the holidays. I tend to fall into a few of these categories.   I recently went to a Christmas pa...

  On December 8, 2015 I decided to write about how my energy can be. When I was a child I remember loving to run around and playing games outside.   I had so much energy.   I remember I could skip rope for hours and swing myself across the monkey bars with no problem.   It seems like young kids have boundless amount of energy that adults do not have. Even while I was in middle school and high school I was able to participate in cross-country running, swimming and track and field and I did not seem to get overly tired.   It felt amazing to be able to push my body to faster speeds and focus on the race at hand.   At times it felt like all my worries and anxiety went away as I stopped focusing on my issues and started focusing on the finish line while running or swimming. I am baffled now when I think back to how crazy busy I was in high school.   With all the sports I was doing, I was also in a few high schools bands.     During the weekd...